why, yes

yes, we do like the rugged, post-apocalyptic, military, survival gear look.
shh, just let it happen:

arclight

thoughts.

• next year is going to suck. why do scheduling conflicts only conflict my schedule? ugh.
• why wont my DVD play on my laptop? I hate the TV room
• why are chocolate covered crickets so costly? I waaant them.
• why is smoking so terrible for you, fuck.
  
• why is the weather like fejwapihfwr n ? make up your miiiind.
  

yeah, i'm just little negative-nelly today, basically.

for a different view

I wish I could drive. When I can, I think maybe I'll live in my car. Then just turn my bedroom into a huge closet and just visit to switch up what I'm packing in my trunk. I'd need a RV to take all my clothes everywhere, no joke.

I bought brown cords yesterday, and I caught myself listening to the Rolling Stones, which I never do. I'm not a Stones fan, I admit it. No Stones, no Beatles. But it's okay, it wasn't too serious. Just a few songs out of a shitload of Black Sabbath, Gorgoroth, and Tiger Army. I'm chill lately, it's new to me. Aside from cords, I'm super into military things, a little bohemian, vintage, and definitely anything rugged and Canadian-esque.

I'm going camping in the states tomorrow evening, I don't know where exactly, but I know it's at a lake. It's overcast right now, the summer kind of clouds, and supposed to rain, so I wonder how the weather will be for that. Personally, more than camping and socializing, I'd like to laze around a few Goodwills and Value Villages. Goodwill tends to turn out some pretty good stuff, and we don't have any this side of the border.

Here's what I'm into especially right now:
Black Sabbath, Apocalypse Now, my beaded flats even though the beads are starting to get scuffed off, pants that are not black skinny jeans, purses, bomber hats [anything pilot-style, really], my AA bathing suit, that dress, robes, my favorite jewelry [crosses and keys, all long and mostly silver], and of course my pretty phone.

what it meant.

"I used to think that if I died in an evil place, my
soul wouldn't be able to get to heaven. But, now? Fuck.
I don't care where it goes, just so long as it aint here."

shitwrecked.

school's almost over. now I really just need money and smokes and we're almost out of tea, fuck.

and epitaphs...

nothing much to say.

when the whole world disappears

i could sometimes really just walk forever.

we got coffee in the dark and boarded home, wheels humming hypnotic on the pavement. slipped into the alternate weightless universe of the pool and just drifted for a while, and then it was green tea and hearse shopping until our eyes scratched like late-night TV static when there's nothing left to watch. all of the sudden it was summer and the world just feels that little bit different, fleetingly eternal and languorous, and each moment takes a lifetime before it never was at all.

comme j'suis jamais ...

i need new hobbies, maybe. i'm not sure. deffinately need a job, of course. maybe a little more determination and a little more drive. optimism is great but that alone won't get you anywhere, i guess. so, now i just need to get what i need. my head is just a big merry-go-round.

nothing left to mutilate

i have the odd sensation of standing next to a busy street screaming
and everyone just keeps on passing by. why do i feel like i'm not there?